True Beauty is dedicated to bringing lifestyle, beauty tips and personal, inspirational experiences of gender transition to the world, using the power of Internet, love, dedication and inner strength.

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of internet, and inner strength, transgender strength, transgender dedication, transgender determination, san francisco transgender center, transgender san francisco, beauty tips and personal, inspirational experiences of gender transition to the world, dedication and inner strength, gender transition is by no means a pleasant or an easy journey, on a contrary it is full of fear, doubt and pain, some choose to hide, some try to defeat it or heal it like a disease or an illness, all to only miserably fail, time is the only variable here, if you are here today, and are standing in my shoes, i hope you will hear what i am trying to tell you, being a full time actor, you will get defeated, no matter how hard you try, please ask yourself, how many more years are you willing to waste to not actually be living as yourself, happy and content with your life, to better display the journey of transition i have separated the entire adventure into phases, for each of the phases, except the self, explanatory research phase o, i will describe in detail in experience articles below, to include photo galleries, i highly recommend to make a similar plan if you are going through transition yourself, to address medical, emotional and physical issues, please let me remind you, that my plan, might not be a great plan for everyone, i have learned to understand that every life and every transition is a unique experience, if you are struggling with steps on your won, i hope some of the following will help you in your own journey, phase o, find a compatible gender, hormone therapist, start hormone replacement therapy, notify the family and loved ones of your transition, establish a plan for a good fitness and a diet routine, separate with the incompatible career, establish high hygiene standards, prepare for voice transition, eliminate belongings of the past, change the gender marker on official paperwork, start the facial electrolysis, complete facial feminization surgeries, recover and adjust, establish yourself in a new environment, complete voice feminization surgery, complete bottom area laser hair removal or electrolysis, complete the sex reassignment surgery, there is nothing more important in your journey to have the proper support, and i do not mean the family and loved one support, we will get to them very soon in a later section, i found myself really lucky by finding dr, caruso in denver, by holding them back, sometimes years, before writing a recommendation for a hormone replacement therapy or gender, confirming surgeries, still to this day, i read stories of psychotherapists, not familiar with gender cases, prescribing anti, depressants as an one, all solution to fix the individual issues, without really trying to understand, what really a person is going through, i want to warn you right away to stay away from anybody, who is calling you depressed or wants you to go through a lengthy process to start your transition, the truth is, most of us today are already so late in our age, finally making the steps in the right direction, that we cannot afford any more years lost of our lives living in a strangers body, to all of these therapists, please listen, with every year a person is not being able to be themselves, they will be more and more depressed and driving a person with anti, depressants or other similar pills you will just drive that individual to insanity, instead of helping them, i am a great example of a healthy transition, with the help of dr, that the sooner you will actually help the person transition, the sooner they will feel truly happy with themselves and their lives, my girlfriend at the time, just as most people would do to help in such difficult and misunderstood case of being transgender, recommended that i see a psychotherapist, which i did, therapist was someone who was working in a local gender identity center, and very familiar with gender issues, no matter how nice it was to talk to a complete stranger and a doctor who is a subject matter expert, it did not help me in any other way, i do not say that it is completely worthless to do so in a beginning or during your transition, because everybody is different and everybody deals with different issues in their own way, it felt like i was wasting  my therapist time, because i knew exactly what i wanted, i knew i wasnt depressed, just sad a little, that ive been acting as a male in the past 30 years, which brought me to an understanding, if i did see someone much earlier in my life, i know i would of made some decisions, which i wasnt ready for at that time, it all worked out, why i didnt feel like i needed any additional therapy support, was the fact of how amazing dr, caruso is not only as a endocrinologist, but also as a person who is attentive, easy to confide in and an ultimate transgender ally, i felt comfortable in his office in mere seconds, able to finally lower my defensive shields and just be me, during my first visit, i could see his passion, but emotionally too, it is my wish, that you all find your  own dr, caruso to help you through your uniquely important journey, personal recommendation, if you do live in colorado or are willing to travel to denver, i highly recommend you visit dr, caruso hyper real beauty office for gender, hair removal or the best hairstyling experience by his associate robi, who is equally as passionate and amazing, their offices are located at, hyper real beauty, michael caruso, md facep, 1650 grant street, co 80203, 3035499057, or in short, is usually one of the best steps you will take during your transition, because of its hugely positive effects on your body and mind, no matter your transition, male to female or female to male, hrt works similarly, in mtf transitions such as my own, the hrt goal is to block the testosterone production and enhance the production of estrogen, which is the dominant hormone in female, born bodies, to be fully transparent, i cannot tell you how amazing of the feeling it is to take the hormones for the first time, psychological effect on your body understanding, it is truly an overwhelming happiness, and i read most of the transgender people have a same emotionally grand effect, i have never been to prison, but i would imagine, thats a similar feeling a person feels after leaving decades long imprisonment, and you were never guilty, secondary to the emotional and psychological effects, hrt produces, are the bodily changes, in ftm transition, such effects can be seen at a much larger scale in comparison to mtf hrt process, deeper voice, facial hair growth and muscular development, in male, female transition, you are actually blocking the production of this very strong hormone and enhancing its opposite, changes from estrogen are very subtle, and from my research, in some patients it takes sometimes a very long time to see the bodily changes, if that happens to be you, be patient and never give up, being a massive hypocrite by saying this because i have zero patience myself, it is important for your body biological process to take its own pace and to stay healthy, as overdosing in the specific hormone enhancement can and will lead to reverse effect, where your body will just convert the hormone it has too much to the opposite one, please listen to your doctor, who will inspect your labs and use only the assigned dosage, as a male, female transitioning patient, i was prescribed testosterone blocker, estrogen and an steroidal antiandrogen help my body to achieve necessary transition results, testosterone blocker and antiandrogen i take daily in a pill form, however for the estrogen i chose to use an intramuscular injection, which i inject myself every two weeks, which brings us to my fear of needles, even after all of the advanced medical training in special forces, i am still very uncomfortable with the needles and now i had to inject myself, i will say, but like the old cliche, beauty is worth the sacrifice, with time i will post a how, to video from a medical professional on how to inject yourself safely, it has been a year since i started my hrt and my results are speaking for themselves, i do have occasional mood swings because of the enhanced amount of estrogen in my body, but the rest 99, of the time i feel so happy, sometimes its hard to even hide the smile, its such a positively life, changing experience, i beat myself up only for not starting my transition earlier, like i mentioned before, were very subtle, but oh, skin is silky soft and glowing, hair is shiny and fuller, breast development went from nothing to a full 34 b and, fat redeposited itself visible from the tummy area to my hips and bottom, i was born with quite a square face, and with diet i would look very rough before the hrt, face looks softer than ever, photos below shows the change in my face, from just hormone replacement therapy, photos will be added october 28th, this is the hardest step in the transition, it is very difficult to give an advice or tell my own experience, i will be talking about it in some of my other posts in more detail, however i cannot stress the importance of telling someone, familiar with your everyday life, that you are going through the transition and that there are certain medical complications, that might arise and you might need their help in giving the right information to the right person, if such event would take place, including transition, is worth losing your life over, please find the inner strength and tell someone, you care about and i promise you they will understand and keep you at least somewhat medically safe, i love one of the new features of the ios for the iphone cell phone line, the newly integrated health application will allow you to create a medical id, with all of your medical notes, medicines youre taking and etc, even if your iphone is still locked, very useful, establish a plan for a good fitness and diet routine, one of the biggest personal insecurities in the world has to be the body weight and body shape, both women and men are upset at themselves for being too skinny, or too curvy, while others are unhappy with the overly masculine, muscular shape of their body, the list goes on, it leads to very unhealthy eating habits and i am, still a victim too, since the times of me joining military and later special forces part of it, i have been always trying to fit in the hyper masculine community, i took testosterone boosters, ate thousands of calories a day and worked out to the point of crashing, it was a necessity at the time, to survive the rigorous training and not to get shunned by my peers, for being too weak to perform the extreme physical tasks, my beautiful feminine body was turned into a mean muscle machine, you probably already have seen in my personal time machine section, the end result is, that today, 50 pounds lighter, i am still fighting to lose the overly big biceps and round shoulders, as they both are still holding me back from wearing sleeveless dresses i love so much, extreme training taught me one thing, diet is the key to all of the weight problems, if you are trying to gain or lose weight, going to the gym and spending a half an hour a day on the elliptical will only get you so far, which is the biggest mistake made by so many of the people i talk to about weight loss, still believe, that starving themselves or becoming bulimic is the answer to the weight loss, i can tell you right now, that is the worst path to take and it will lead you to a great disaster in the end, to give you a great example, i have not eaten once for 8 days straight and lost almost 10 pounds, it took me about another 8, 10 days of regular diet just to gain it all back, this happens, because the body adapts to the incoming energy source, food caloric value and the amount consumed and then it adjusts your metabolism, fastening it up or slowing it down, like in the previous example, when you choose to starve yourself, and your body starts digging into its own reserves to survive, body starts to eat itself and chooses easy to process muscle fibers first, fat deposits second, leaves you very weak and not being able to perform even normal daily duties, while at the end you end up burning even less energy, and as soon as you give your body some food, almost as if being scared it might be its last meal, body will save all of it in a form of fat in your reserves, even more chubbiness, as you can see, starving yourself is absolutely the worst path to take, if you are trying to lose weight, so how do you do it the healthy way, biceps and your chest muscles are quite small in comparison to some of the largest muscle groups, supporting your legs and your back, what that means, if you are actively engaging your lower body through exercises, found in cross fit and traditional olympic lifting, your body will burn much larger amounts of energy and increase your heart rate, that is a win for you, because a low carbohydrate diet will not be sufficient to replenish these systems, engaging your body to burn the unwanted fat on your body, pretty simple concept, lastly, i recommend, be it losing weight, toning or gaining muscle, without a specific plan for diet and fitness you will not get anywhere, the fitness section i wrote a few weeks ago is a good route to take, if you would like to give my, lower body engagement full of, routines a try, the link to it is just below, oh and never give up, it is so difficult to give up everything, you have been working for so many years on, while establishing yourself with the particular career, family and social circles, quite possibly, you are very successful at it too and, even you were acting as a wrong gender, which makes a path to success that much more difficult, what you have to ask yourself, are you truly happy to wake up every morning and put on the clothes of your acted gender, go and perform a job for purely materialistic reasons, please ask yourself these questions, you will know the answer in your heart, i did, and i realized, way too late, that most of us are bound to become a gray mass of working bees, who perform a set of specific tasks in the society, while living a short life on this planet, then why should we do it as a wrong gender, just choose a profession, which you will love and where you will feel comfortable with the environment every day, you have to take that risk for your ultimate happiness, you just have to, i have worked in the information technology, industry all of my life, from the age of 12, over the years, i ended up taking part in such a wide variety of different computer fields, i can fill an entire page of my resume with just the skills from it industry, all of these skills were extremely helpful and enabled me, to be able to do some incredible things on my own, including the launch of this project, which i am so grateful for, take this computer knowledge and add fluent multilingual capability in a few, worldwide used, then add the military tactical training, i have received during my last 5 years, while being part of the special forces in the u, and you will have a person who is dependable and full of potential in some technical fields, and for what, to continue living a lie, acting that i am a man, and to continue to dread every day, while putting on the silly monkey costume to go and perform on the job, i have no heart for, i am no longer playing this rat race, i finally made up my mind to study the art of cosmetology, something i wanted to do, i might never make as much of the money, i did as a man, however i will do something i love and, that will surely lead to some healthy and successful career opportunities in the future, so look around you, ask yourself these questions, with the most important one, as not the true gender that you are, i am so sad, that every time i see a cross, dresser or a newly come out as transgender person in public, they have not shaved their beard and applied make, up on top of it, or have applied lipstick, what it seems, a house painting brush, what makes me upset mostly, is that a lot of times people get so focused with wearing the appropriate gender, that the general hygiene guidelines are completely forgotten and ignored in the process, when it should all start with zero clothes on your body, before you go out, inspect yourself in the up, close mirror, one body part of the time and ask yourself, if you are honestly satisfied with everything, ready to represent the specific gender, this will ensure you dont miss anything, the secret of passing as a woman, was purely adjusting certain things in a particular way, to change the perception, of what other people expect to see, i am taller than most women, understanding this, i chose to study the art of fashion, up and skin care, to better understand, on how i could compliment certain features and hide the unwanted ones, it is very similar to the contouring techniques in the make, up world, where you usually highlight the features you want to accent and define and contour the others, you want to disappear from your face, after studying myself in the mirror, i attacked my body, one body part at a time, seeking the highest standard, i can possibly achieve at this time and beyond, and it really helped, i remember the day i had no make, up on, wore the manly military uniform and a held a green beret in my hand, trying to order food on a military base, every sales person was referring to me maam, this was happening, because people picked up on so many other cues, i was giving out at that time, such as my hair style, shaped eye, beardless and moisturized skin, maintained lips and many others, my point is, who is simply transgender or just another person in public, take care of your body first, learn the appropriate routines for make, up application, nail and hair care, these are the first things people will look at and judge you by, not your clothes, and once hygiene is all in order, go ahead and become the shopaholic, i currently am, step 4, ughhh, i hate my voice with a passion you would not believe existed, i have an accent too, so people take extra attention to listen to me when i speak, when i am in public, i can do pretty well, however on the phone i almost always get called sir, no matter what i do, i am planning to get a voice surgery in the yeson voice center in south korea in the close future, in the meantime, i have explored some other options, which might help, even the surgeons, who perform the voice feminization surgeries, that their patients train the tone and resonance of their voice before the actual surgery, so the results are that much more successful, while many resources and advices are available for free, by simply entering voice feminization in google search, i ended up getting some lessons from kathe perez, who has developed a pretty comprehensive 30 day crash course to help with the voice feminization, it is not free, and her website is found, using the following link, “the greatest risk that any of us will take—to be seen for who we truly are”, i grew up in a family, where a social status and how the rest of the world perceived us meant everything, dont do, insert a verb here, dont be like, insert a name here, it will make our family look bad, was pretty much a daily routine in my home, it sounds so silly now, looking back to those days, because i wasnt growing up in any celebrity or a politicians home, to whom, public image could have meant their entire careers, i grew up in a simple and a very uptight family, in a grand scale of things, really arent that important, would be almost okay, except i was born transgender, i tried to fit the set expectations so vigorously and, the next thing i know, 30 years of my life, and not a minute lived as my true self, in many other cases, i hear about, you could change that number to 40, and i have to ask, what kind of crime sentence do you have to be born with, to live imprisoned by the social norm shackles your entire life, i should mention, to put things in a greater perspective, that i have been born in a post, communist era lithuania, a world where two colors existed, and there was no such thing as a gray area, or walking the line, there was only yes or no, and in gender case, female or male, we could blame the lack of media, controlled education and the internet only slowly becoming a commodity, however today is 2015, and transgender existence, has been known to the human kind how for many hundreds of years, and yet, in lithuania or the great country of the united states it is not taught about, misinterpreted as gay, hated as a mental disease or a mutation, people are getting killed every year for being transgender, not only in the united states, but all over the world, we are killing our fellow human beings, because we fear of the unknown, or is it because even in a year 2015, we still desire to live in a much easier, black and white world, education and general media, are the most to blame, an entire world looking up to the united states of america, and education value is enormous, utilizing simple entertainment, we are teaching the freedom, the democracy and many other subjects to the people in the countries, who have never seen or heard of it, i was one of those newly educated individuals many years ago, when i decided to leave my own country too, that entertainment drives our country today, and we know how to produce it the best, what we do forget, is that a simple movie or a show, we might just treat like an hour in front of tv with a bowl of popcorn, in other countries is perceived almost to a level of an educational film or a documentary, and in many cases, it is viewed multiple times over, and the worst, is what we are teaching, we are displaying characters as deranged men who are scratching the list of people, kill while putting on lipstick, like very recently, we unveil in a very popular show pretty little liars, where the main character is portrayed as a transgender individual, who has been terrorizing the other characters in the show for the past 6 seasons, these are just too disgusting examples, and i mean, do we have nothing else to resort to than portray individuals, who just wore a different type of clothing or used make, up as vicious serial killers and maniacs, how can we expect a person, who goes to work for 8, 12 hours per day and comes back home to watch a show or two before dinner and bed, to continue the same cycle tomorrow, to even begin to comprehend on what really does it mean to be transgender, with a recent transgender community exposure on the television, things seem to change, currently airing i am jazz, becoming us and i am cait reality shows, finally are bringing the misunderstood world of transgender individuals to the light, someone please kill it, or i will and there are no legal actions pursued against such threat, what are we teaching the people around in our own country and beyond, so many questions and so few, who take the risk to answer them, these subjects already have been discussed numerous times and what we need is to set the anger aside, and just as a fairy godmother in cinderella, we should all try to see the world as it could, believe in courage and kindness, and a little bit of magic, we need to stop asking the question why, and see, while steps are being taken in the right direction, it is not enough, before you, many brutal beatings, blood and tears later, standing before you, thanking my luck, i am still alive, while so many were not so lucky, i have chosen to not hide them and i am not going to go stealth now, call me an idealist, however i still believe in humanity and the few people i had an opportunity to educate, are very accepting and supportive, this gives me hope, that my message will be heard by many others too, even if i can spark a thought in your mind i have succeeded, i am transgender, i am a woman, by everyone around me, have been set to be a man, there is no real and existing scientific capacity to detect that one might be transgender, when a baby is born and it is not like you can speak your mind at that point until a few years after, it makes a complete sense to assign the gender, based on your reproductive organs, while it would be quite a cute picture for a little baby, coming out of their mothers womb, to wear a tiny t, with words i am a boy or i am a girl, it is just not realistic, the most important moment comes in their life much later, when the child starts developing, starts thinking for themselves and starts making rational decisions, when most parents fail, i would ask for dolls and, i would be given trains and cars, i would ask, to wear pretty and colorful clothes, instead i, would be given bleak, boyish choices, to keep my hair long and, it would be perceived as me being rebellious and made to cut it off, for the fear of the public image, for the fear of the safety of the child, and for the fear, that your own child might be different, i praise parents, like jazz jennings parents, who have accepted their child, for who she is and allowed her to live a healthy life as a child and teenager, helped her with the biological transition, to give her a chance at a normal life, there is hope, most of the time, leads to a justification of not normal or mentally not stable in peoples minds, and that is, what being transgender has become over the years, i have left my home at an age of 16, moved to london, united kingdom on my own, with nobody waiting in the foreign language speaking country and in two years again, moved to the united states of america, again on my own, i have survived, learned how to pay the bills, make food, do the personal hygiene and be presentable in the many job opportunities i have taken part in, i did this all on my own, nobody to turn back and to say thank you, is that normal enough for a human being, at some point, i joined the military service in the country i love so much, and have passed the rigorous u, army special forces school of two years, which 1, out of 1, pass and get to dawn the green beret, you might be thinking so what, proud much, but the real question stands, is it normal enough, i have done all of this on my own and i am transgender, people dare to view transgender as mentally ill serial killers, i say, please try imagining living as me for the past 16 years, or be in many other shoes, who have had to resort to things like prostitution and engage in sexual acts, often leading to rape, to not support the unhealthy drug habits, but to simply just be themselves, just to be able to afford the ever, costly body modifying surgeries and to fit in with the rest of society, to no longer get questioned about how normal they are, transgender women and men had to resort to living in stealth, just imagine for a moment again, in my past 31 years, i have woken up every morning and had to act as if i was a man, i had to deal with everything, what you deal on a daily basis, but to fit a social normality, i had to present myself and  learn to fit in a male world, and i am a woman, do you see the parapraxis here, am i the only example, there are thousands of people around the world doing what i did in their unique way, if you look around, the person working next to you, might be one of them, denied the chance to be free, to be themselves, living everyday a lie, just to fit in, fitting in was the only issue for a transgender person, open threats, adult bullying, beatings and even death, has become a normal part of transgender individual life, this is beyond my understanding, so instead of asking why, i shall go on the offensive for a moment and please bear with me, most transgender people work very hard, have no issue to serve the country and pay the ultimate price to protect it, pay consistent taxes and do community and public service in one form or another, full of discrimination lives, i was a manager in a popular retail store for 6 years and did my own hiring, i would meet probably 5, 10 capable individuals every week, who would come in with a trying, employed sheet, required by the unemployment agencies to have filled by the potential employers, to prove that the individual is actually looking for a job, every single time when asked if they would like to fill out an application, the response was the same, could you please just sign this, unemployment agency, paper for me, i am only missing, insert number here, set of signatures to be eligible to continue and receive my unemployment benefits, is this normal, and is it normal to deny transgender people, when they are willing to work probably harder than most of your employees, just because of your acceptance, is it normal to just shun, kill someone, who might not be like you and not even give them a chance to be a valuable part of our society, i know it hurts, i am there with you, and instead of asking why, please help someone, give them a chance and you will most definitely will be amazed by the potential, the transgender person can offer in your life or as an employee in your business, a person, says transgender people have superpowers and, i believe her, it really hurts me, to point fingers at the known and sometimes purposely ignored subjects, to make myself or others to look better, no one is perfect and everyone is struggling through the life in their own way, what i am trying to show you, is that judging a community or a single person because of their decisions in life is just wrong, like many others, has their rotten apples and i know, that we have to change the way we perceive things, or change the values taught by our parents, who lived in a different era, and it is a lot to ask for, your acceptance and understanding, that being transgender is normal will make this world a better place for everybody, which i can promise, because a true potential can only be unlocked, when the person is truly free, means just that, to be a normal individual in this world, who has dreams, opinions and who are struggling through the life, just like everybody else, we are not serial killers or someone to be feared, we are humans, who have been given a different angle in the evolution of humankind and we did not ask for it, we dont ask for special treatment, we just want to be able to not look behind the shoulder for our safety, and not have to worry about what bathroom to use in public, when we leave our homes to do what other normal people do, the plastic surgery field has been developing for many years and today, many choose to enhance their visual appearance, for both personal and professional reasons, as the demand grew, plastic surgeons started to work with transgender patients too, it was a much different world, since transgender patients offered a much different and unexplored frontier, performed on them, required the results to have not only enhancing, but also a transforming effect, enabling patients to present and pass better, as the gender they wished to represent, some of the surgeries, such as breast enhancement or breast reduction, also referred as a top surgery, were quite a simple transition, but many others required a much different approach, transgender women patients wished to soften their facial features, giving it a more feminine look, to these patients, often meant less harassment and discrimination in public, enabled them to lead healthier and safer lives, because of this, particular demand, experienced plastic surgeons are now offering facial feminization surgery, which include many surgical procedures, designed to provide the transgender patients with the most satisfying results, having a great medical skill is not enough to be revered in the industry as a great ffs surgeon, the biggest challenge is, that every patient and every face are unique, to deliver great results, surgeons have to have a great imagination and an artistic mind, often they have been compared to sculptors, who could take a piece of dirt and mold it into a beautiful shape, for everybody to enjoy, artists of such level are very rare, if you are planning to have ffs, i recommend you start your research earlier than later, it was an ear angle reduction surgery, called an otoplasty, i was always insecure about my ears, so i saved up some money and had them fixed in san francisco, results were great and, it was a simple surgery, gave me a great boost in self, esteem and provided with the much necessary emotional foundation for the future, i want you to understand, that sometimes, i am mad too at the evolution, which placed me in this position in life, because each of the plastic surgeries pose some risk to your life and are extremely expensive, i try to focus on the fact, that at least it is available and with strong determination, could be achieved, by just about anybody, going into surgery and post, surgery recovery and final results are very emotional times, so i push the bad thoughts away and think about the bright future, awaiting for me, when i decided to transition, i knew ffs is going to be the first big step for me, deformed by hormonal imbalances over the years, i ended up doing a lot of research and reaching out to ffs experts in several foreign countries, it was very difficult to imagine at first, traveling to another country, to perform something so serious to your body, under a set of completely different set of moral values and laws, unfortunately foreign clinics, mostly located in asia, have a much larger demand, than what we have here in the united states, which makes their surgeons some of the best experts in their field, while there is a considerable amount of risk, because their shared ffs results, seen on personal blogs or youtube vlogs, are absolutely incredible, after a few months of research, i have finally settled to have my procedures to be done in a famous clinic, called id hospital, which is located in the south korea, id hospital clinic, is a home to a famous plastic surgeon dr, for his expertise, has been featured even in the articles of some biggest media outlets, in the u, after exchanging photographs, park recommended a set of five different procedures, to achieve my desired results, i will be posting day, day updates, photographs and my recovery progress in a separate section on this site, to give a better idea for all of you out there, so stay tuned, the surgery day is very close, are the photos i sent to dr, park for initial evaluation, park recommended the following surgeries, preliminary recommendations are purely recommendations, and it takes a person, person consultation, with well experienced doctors, using possible x, ray and ct scans, in order to give an accurate diagnosis and then create the best individual surgical plan, forehead implant, forehead fat grafting my complaint, my eyebrow line is too pronounced to be feminine, your eyebrow bone looks more protruding since your forehead is quite sunken, in order to create softer and feminine image, forehead implant insertion or fat grafting is recommended, line surgery, mandible angle reduction, chin genioplasty, my complaint, my chin is too wide and my jawline is too pronounced, making my face to look as a shape of a square, it appears that you have quite developed mandible angle and long, wide chin, this can be improved by v, developed mandible angle and lower chin can give off a strong and masculine impression, making one’s face looks bigger and wider, our v, line surgery will help you achieve a smaller face with slimmer and more defined jaw line, nose tip plasty my complaint, my nose is too wide and does not have a feminine shape, you nose looks generally fine but if you would like to achieve more feminine appeal, we would like recommend a tip plasty for you, we will make your nose tip smaller and more defined, which will the give you a more sophisticated image, for the sagging skin, located around the eyelid area, brow lifting is recommended, some of the benefits, it gives you younger, looking eyes and, due to a sagging skin, this will also prevent possible wrinkles, caused from unnecessary facial expression, it will provide with the functional factors as well as aesthetic factors, such as resolving issues of your eyelashes poking your eyes, fierce image will be gone, you’ll look softer and feminine since your eyes will look bigger, full face fat grafting recommendation, it appears that some areas on your face such as forehead, cheek and nasolabial folds are quite sunken due to lack of fat, any area with excess fat tissue, such as thigh or abdominal region, will be removed, and centrifuged, the processed fat tissue will then be administered to the area of interest via injection, since the fat tissue comes from your own body, your body will not recognize the fat tissue as foreign materials, which may cause immune responses, once the fat tissue is injected, it can provide more than enough resilience, and younger looking expression to the overall face structure, from the moment i looked at my friends brush pile in the bathroom, my intimidation towards make, up grew larger, i was trying to approach it from the angle of painting lessons in my childhood, small brush for small strokes and big brushes for wide strokes, but it didnt end at that, the more i looked the more a realized that some of the big, thick brushes were angled, some of them pointy, i didnt find peace by studying small brushes either, i felt dumbfounded, lost and couldnt even begin to think about make, up itself, blocked off at the very doorstep to beauty, as time went on, many lessons from my friend and youtube videos later, i started to see the light in the end of the tunnel, by no means i am an expert, but if the foot fits the shoe, up brushes can get very expensive, theyre care is also, by no means easy, so i decided for my beginner set to turn to the country where everything is manufactured today, i consider myself an amateur shopaholic, so turning to websites such us www, com or www, com was a salvation to my wallet, gender transition is expensive enough, so let me recommend a couple of brush sets to you, which are cheap and yet do a great job, shipping and delivery takes about 2, 3 weeks and sometimes 4 from aliexpress, however its well worth the wait, omg you say, thats 42 different brushes, its easier than you think, after a while i have used the leather carrier and combined both of the brush sets, removing the ones i dont use currently, so here is how my final 24, brush set looks right now, 2 of the brushes are not from either of the kits, according to my friend who is a make, up enthusiast, is fairly comparable to the higher quality ones, for a total of, 26 and a free shipping, i could of not asked for more, i really like the leather carrier, because i have ocd about organization and when the time comes to do make, up i want any brush to be accessible to me right away, up brushes just like in painting could be used for different purposes depending on a personal choice, however this is how i assigned mine, i hope this was easy enough for you to see some of the purposes for the brushes, no technique is perfect and every girl is unique, so go ahead, go out there and start building your own make, up brush set, there is no reason for intimidation, because you will find your own use of every brush you acquire, dont forget the brush cleaning solution with it and blend blend blend, now that you know the basics about the make, up brushes, feel free to continue to the next post, by clicking the link below, about how to use them, i understand all too well, what it means to be born with a flatter chest and no booty, it is sooo annoying, everywhere you look, it is so overwhelming and a regular girl doesnt even know where to turn anymore, while i support dieting and certain workout programs out there to be effective, i still, look in the mirror, probably too many times for my own good, and want to see the beautiful me with a smaller waist, curvier breasts and rounder booty, flatter back, wider hips and, ughhhhh, its never enough, while hair, up and my fashion are all important factors in total image, i feel like my body is the true representation of me, judge me all you want, i just want to be a beautiful woman as much on the outside as on the inside, i missed all of the years, growing up as a teenager girl and later a young woman, it really makes me very sad sometimes, because i know i could of developed and enjoyed my body just that much more today at an age of 31, many bad decisions later, its the price i am willing to pay, over the years of living in a male body, i was exposed to a great amount of exercising, i had an incredible amount of great teachers and, i am very happy to share my knowledge with you, so together we can  turn a head or two on a street, i despise eating, my grandmother tells me, that feeding me was the most challenging tasks of the day, i would cry and kick and yell, whatever it took to avoid food at all costs, i realize, that it has not changed at all, i still hate food and it takes great lengths for me to truly enjoy the process of eating, i dont know if it is because i have underdeveloped taste buds or some other genetic reason, but i do know that like everything else it is a two sided coin, eating less keeps me slim, however i have real difficulty gaining the feminine curves i want, it is a simple formula, that if you eat a lot and dont exercise, you are bound to become the overweight statistic and you can say goodbye to the yoga pants, tight shirts or wearing a sleeveless dress and feeling good about yourself, if that is you right now, i want you to get angry, very very angry and break that cycle, just think of yourself the day you will be trying on the bridal dress for your wedding, thought about it, you can be angry at me now, but what i really want for you is that you realize, on the other side weve all seen the transgender women, who choose to under, which leads to a very string looking body type and curves, even if they were there before, are all gone, bye bye round bum, to this day, this is the battle i am fighting myself, but one thing is sure, if i dont engage the lower body in exercise, i will never see my thighs where i want them, my goal is always to be able to wear the bikini, or the skinny jeans with a short top and see my hips and thighs create a wider image there, that a good looking lower body will take attention off other imperfections we all have too many of, my approach to workouts is always very much lower body focused, in my opinion, a girl will never look good with wide and built up upper body in a dress, as women struggle, with a huge gender disparity in a job market and just about everywhere else, image plays an enormous role in your success, while some  of the men are very sexist and unfortunately they are in charge, we are only left with two choices, to fight it and almost always lose or be the beautiful women, we are expected to be and fill theyre ranks, change the way we are perceived in a long run, in the end it feels empowering to feel beautiful, and a good diet, exercise combo is always the first step, no fitness program is bad, they all serve theyre purpose, and often are developed by people, who have been training for many years to create it, none of them are fix, each routine has focused, specific effects, training your strength, or just overall fitness, what are the results you seek and which program can actually offer it, i have tried a lot of them for extended periods of time, and was able to take home something from each one of them, and that is what i recommend for you too, if you are trying to expand your fitness horizons, my personal favorites are, brazil butt lift and p90x, but a well taught and booty focused zumba class will always win my heart, yoga and pilates are unbeatable, when it comes to the flexibility training, with enhanced curves and overall flexibility in mind, and the fact that i never do have a ton of time to purely dedicate for my fitness, i knew its time to get creative, which i love so much, and that is where my approach comes in, my approach rounder booty, fuller breasts and a sexy waist are what i want for me, and what i kept in mind, i did realize right away, that not everyone will want to have the level of intensity, or the same goals, most importantly, not everyone is at the same level of fitness today, thats where, i have decided to split the routine into three phases, getting busy and lets rock, the difference between them is your level of motivation, your current fitness readiness and the time available, that said, i do believe, that even a beginner could start with the lets rock section right away, instead of progressing through the first two, same goes for the lets rock girl, who time availability shrunk, or if her living situation has changed and there are no gyms around, she can then transition to one of the other sections and still keep her body fit and tight, the chart below will give you a much better idea of where you might fit in today, general fitness guidelinesif you havent done a particular exercise, look up the proper technique on youtube, active stretching is done before workout and static stretching is done in the end, the higher your heart rate is during the workout, the more burn effect your body is experiencing, rest for less than 60 seconds in between sets to gain size and 60, 180 seconds to gain strength, you can never overwork your abs with your body weight even if you do it every day, several times per day, do not sit in between the sets, walking around keeps the body activated, proper form always wins against the amount of weight, transitioning to a female gender comes with a unique set of challenges, because living as a man, well lets just say it is easier, but men do not have many of the privileges we have, and one of them is being beautiful, up enhances our beauty every day and it is actually really exciting to write this post to all of you, because i am in love with make, up and i cannot wait to become an expert, i have been extremely intimidated by the whole make, up business all of my life, it always seemed, up was this magical, complicated journey, a girl started in 7th, ish grade and it takes years of development, learning and techniques perfecting to do gorgeous make, to my surprise, it really was not as difficult, as i thought initially, with the current amount of youtube famous how, shared by many professional make, up artists and famous large companies, such as sephora, pretty much any girl can find a specific look, they are trying to achieve, my personal journey with make, up started with my best friend marissa, who is also a make, she has shared an enormous amount of time teaching me and sharing actual make, which i have so much at this point, i could probably start a beauty shop, thanks marissa, and to this day, i am discovering new guides and videos to expand my expertise, because the last thing i want, is to look bad in public, it can become an addiction, so be cautious, or not, i cannot even go to the grocery store without make, so life can be difficult sometimes, but nothing can replace the feeling, you have about yourself, when you look in the mirror and you love what you see, so lets get started and lets get prettier, a quick disclaimer, up and styles used in this guide are not a one, which might work the best for your skin, i also greatly recommend you read and reference back to the beginners make, as it might make your life a lot easier when i mention specific brush types or styles, prepare your face, you will want to wash your face really well, as make, up will clog the pores of your skin, you want the least bacteria on your face possible, when that happens, i have tried many of the face, wash solutions out there and, proactiv skin smoothing exfoliator is my favorite, i use it twice a day and right after wiping the make, up off, if you do have facial hair, i recommend you do a very close shave, because nothing is worse, than to see a beard protruding past a layer of make, ive seen it before and lets just say it is not pretty, if youre one of the girls, who are still fighting the hormonal battle and your facial hair grows before your eyes, make sure to always have a travel make, up bag, to touch up your imperfections throughout the day, apply a good moisturizer to all of your face and neck areas, this will allow the make, up to set better and prevent your skin from oiling up on you, i use proactiv complexion perfecting hydrator and it works very well, apply primer, applying a primer is very important, because it can dramatically reduce the appearance of pores almost instantly, it will allow the make up, to appear more evenly distributed, giving you the flawless smooth look all over, ive so far used a few brands and they all work great, however i recommend you perform a simple test in the beauty store, applysome of the cream on your top part of your hand, where skin pores are most visible, gently rub and blend it in, until it is not visible, if all of your pores have magically disappeared, and the area looks and feels smooth like silk, you have probably found one of the great candidates you should buy, smashbox photo finish foundation primer, pixi redness reducing primer and mally perfect prep primer and i apply it all over the face, including the eyelids, using a wide foundation brush, i do not use it, a good foundation can become your best friend and hide all of your skin imperfections, including the growth of facial hair for extended periods of time, it also controls oil and allows the make, up colors really stand out when applied on top of it, remember to match it with the color of your neck and not the color of your face, if your face is darker than your neck and your foundation matches the face, it will look like a mask because of the difference in color, the opposite is also true, if your face is lighter than your neck and you put on a foundation that matches the face, it will still look like a mask because of the difference in color, in situations like this, i recommend to apply the foundation cream, distributing it, evenly all over the face and areas of the neck, if necessary, do not over, a simple skin bump is not worth applying a layer so thick, that anybody, even half, will be able to tell that you have an inch worth of foundation, my favorite brands are, mac studio fix fluid and mally ultimate performance fluid foundation, apply bb cream, since i dont use foundation on a regular basis, my go, to for a sunscreen, oil control and evening out the shade of the skin is always the bb cream, it is almost like a much lighter version of a foundation, and if you have a pretty healthy skin, i recommend you use it always instead, most bb creams come in 3, 5 shades and are more of a one, most type product, because they are designed to enhance not to cover, maybelline dream fresh bb and mally face defender bb creams, to apply it, you will want to place a small amount in the center of your forehead, on your nose bridge, on your cheeks and on your chin, using one of your blending brushes, lightly redistribute and blend it all over those areas, at this point, your skin should start to look absolutely flawless, color the eyebrows, i really recommend, arch enhancing shape, to find the right person, use yelp reviews, up comes in a few forms, liner and cream, i have tried all three and, cream is my favorite, i realized, that they all serve different purposes, while cream is used to define your brow, pencil and liner versions are used to achieve a more for a subtle and softer look, that you try out all of the options and see, what fits you most, no matter what form you will use today, that you start by taking an eyebrow brush and brush your eyebrows out really well, before color application, then take your applicator, in whichever form you chose, and find the arch in the bottom section of of your eyebrow, start by lightly painting the line down to the outer eyebrow edge, once you complete that, repeat the same on the top, paint the arch highest point down  to the outer edge, when you are done, place a brush pointed vertically against your nostril, like in a left picture below, this is the section you want your eyebrow to start, draw a thin vertical line on your eyebrow in this area, and start painting the bottom and top sections towards your arch, once you are done and have a beautiful box inside your eyebrow, fill the inside of the box in with a set of light strokes, take a look at these pictures for additional help, if you are still confused, at this point your eyebrow color might be very strong, but fear not, we are about to fix that, take the eyebrow brush, found either in your make, up kit, and the outer section, following the eyebrow shape, the longer you will spend, brush your eyebrow, the lighter it will become, so play with it and find the color tone you like for you, when done, take a cue, beauty tip and run it on its side, firmly against the outside of your eyebrow shape, when you are picking the color for your eyebrows, i would recommend to picking the color, which is the closest to your hair color, unless you are super bleached blonde, in which case a pure black color will be your most likely choice, i use, anastasia beverly hills brow wiz liner and dipbrow promade cream, apply highlighting, illuminating cream, highlighters and illuminating cream purposes are, to enhance, while different face shapes somewhat differ in the application areas, most of women will apply highlighting, illuminating solutions to the following areas of their face, if you are going to contour also, go ahead and do that now, take one of your blending brushes and lightly blend out the highlighter lines, for areas next to the inner section of the eye, i recommend you use something similar to the oval foundation brushes and blend it out, in a gentle tapping motion, my favorite products are, bare minerals stroke of light, eye brightener and mally perfect prep, apply contouring cream, while not very complicated, is a more advanced skill, in this guide, i am going to skip it and allow you to work on the basics, for the general knowledge, i just want you to know, making them stand out less, allowing the highlighted sections stand out and shine even more, contouring also allows you to  define certain features of your face, which i absolutely love, so lets skip this for now and move to the next step, powder will be our finishing touch for the skin texture all of the work you have done so far, it also serves as a make, up setter and is a must, it is a good practice to buy powder in a few different shades, close to you own skin color, which will allow you to efficiently work many of the different angles on your skin, using a large powder brush, dab it a few times in the powder, shake off the excess and lightly apply in the brown areas, depicted in the picture below, take a smaller, shadow size brush and perfect the shade of your skin around your eyebrows, to further define them, use the lightest possible color of powder in the green areas of the picture, color the eyes, best part of my day, every day is the part, when i have to do my eyes, because i love, how it transforms my face and makes me look dreamy, getting your eyes done, will be a few steps, so bear with me, with many eye, shadow pallets around, i recommend you get the nudes type of eyeshadow pallet for your beginning tries, you are going to want to take care of your outer corner of the eye, by dabbing the outer eye, crease brush in the darkest brown colors in the pallet, shaking the excess off and dabbing the outer crease of your eye, you are going to want to find your oval shaped eye, shadow brush and dab it in a much the lighter brown color of your pallet, drag the brush, in a back and forth motion, from the imaginary vertical line, located about 40, of your eyelid away from your inner crease of the eye, all the way to the outer crease of the eye, once done, to finish, using the oval eye, shadow brush, apply the same silver or champagne color in the horizontal motion to the first 40, of the eyelid, take the eye, shadow blending brush and in a light, horizontally angled motion, blend the 3 colors together until you can no longer see the vertical transition lines, also if you did mess up a bit or dragged the colors too high up, you can easily retouch the brightener or powder right under the outer section of the eyebrow, located above number 1 and 2 sections in the above picture, the pallets i would recommend for your beginner eye work are, maybelline the nudes and sonia kashuk eye on neutral, we will take a black eye, in a firm motion, apply the pencil, by dragging it back and forth on the water line, from our outer crease towards the center of the eye, depending on your eye shape, you will want to add or remove up to 20, of this length, your end result, should be to not be able to see a clear vertical line, where the black color ends after you have released the water line back into its normal position, once done with the waterline, all you have left is to put the glamorizing and, lengthening black mascara on both upper and bottom of the eye, lash sections, there are many techniques and all of them are very self explanatory, so i will not go into them, however if you do mess up in the process of application, use the make, up remover pen to fix the spots efficiently, mascara comes in many different brands, shapes and forms, with every company claiming their brush is the best and most innovative, end story is, that there is no such thing as a great mascara brush, so just try and see what works for you, the brands i currently use are, benefit theyre real and rimmel scandaleyes, apply blush and bronzer, a well applied blush and bronzer, will further enhance and accent your cheekbones, add a beautiful color contrast to the overall look, both of them are applied using blush type, in the picture below, you can see the pink areas depicted, as the blush areas and the brown areas, as bronzer areas, if you are unsure, push your lips forwards, everything above this cheekbone line is blush area and everything below is the bronzer area, i would not make your blush and bronzer lines to be thicker, than an inch or two max, otherwise you will get create the clown effect, i have seen before and it does not look cute at all, blushing your cheekbones will make you so pretty, so find the color you really love, sonia kashuk 53 glow and milani baked blush, 02 rose doro, color the lips, we are almost done, with lips being the last part of this adventure, that you apply a lip moisturizer as a first step, and then take a lip liner pencil in a color similar, but slightly darker, than the lipstick you are planning on wearing, using this pencil draw the outline of your lips, take your lipstick and, using the tube, or the lipstick brush, fill in the rest of the lips area, when finished, allowing the lipstick excess from your inner section of the lips to end up on it, this technique will ensure the lipstick is not gonna stain your teeth, to further set your lipstick into the lips, you can kiss a paper napkin, which will take the shimmery look away and give your lips a more solid, matte look, there are a gazillion versions of lip, liner pencils, and other versions of lip coloring tools and colors, explore and find the ones you like, inspection for the imperfections time, i am overly perfectionist, which sometimes extends the time of make, up application by a lot, inspecting yourself up, close in the mirror and in a different light, will really show if you did a good job blending and if color shades are not off, with the skin natural color protruding in certain sections, take a few minutes and correct the issues you find, smile and take a selfie, it is very nice to save a memory of your make, up progression, which you can study later and find if certain, lines or colors can be adjusted and perfected in the future, do not get discouraged if it took you a very long time, the first try to finish your make, i am pretty sure the first time it took me like two and a half hours, just because of the transformation it gives to your look, if you have a specific question send me a message and stay prettie, what separates the beautiful from the gorgeous is usually a well done contouring, so many women out there are intimidated to do it themselves, and they are really missing out, because contouring can truly transform you and give you a celebrity look in just a few strokes, i was too very intimidated, but with a little research and some practice, i got the hang of it, contouring is the use of light and dark, to help shape, sculpt and define your face, it basically allows you to change, hide or accent certain parts of your face, literally enabling you to modify the actual shape of it, as seen to others, finding the shape of your the very first step is to identify the current shape of your face, from the four basic shapes depicted in the pictures below, this is very important to determine correctly, the later shown how, guides will provide us with the specific sections, you will need to to contour and highlight, for that glamorous look, a great and comprehensive video bellow posted by sephora on youtube will help you out, i absolutely love sephora make, up guides, because they have top make, up industry experts leading their professional videos and, you are not expected to know a single thing about make, before learning something new, this is crucial to some of us girls out there, who havent been taught by our mommas about the tricks of the trade, nose contouring, you probably have established, which of the shape your face is closest to, which leads us to the fun part, or actually drawing some beauty onto it, my shape is a square and it will probably will change to one the other shapes, after my facial feminization surgeries, which will then make me to re, learn the contouring together with all of you, one thing doesnt really change from one shape to another and that is usually the nose contouring, so lets take a look at a great how, posted by one of the sydney sweethearts stephanie lange, teaching a great technique to make your nose look a lot smaller, face contouring  i am sure we all have cute barbie like noses after such a great tutorial, so lets move forward to the last part, contouring and highlighting your face, as far as brushes goes, i currently use my oval concealer brush for my nose contouring and an angled blush, contouring brush for all other areas of my face, there are many shades of contouring creams, however i ended up finding out that the sonia kashuk 42 rich bronze, undetectable cream bronzer works the best for my skin tone, however there are many other brands out there, and i recommend, you consult with one of the beauty experts working in a store, to pick something what works for you right away, one of the reasons, i am absolutely in love with ulta beauty store, to highlight the other parts of my areas of the face, i use an oval foundation brush and bare minerals stroke of light, as i have stated in my previous post of the basic make, with a link to it listed below, and lastly, since we have the products all figured out, i want you to pick the corresponding video, from the ones bellow, in relation to the shape of your face and start to practice, the beauty awaits, thank you sephora for helping all of us on the path to the true beauty, one of my favorite things in beauty is to work on nails, i am very new to the nail art itself, and i am very sad, i havent been taking pictures in the past, i am sure, that over the time, this gallery will become  a great resource for all of you out there, to pick up some ideas, as i was browsing sites looking for my evening internet fix, i found this great video, posted by hbo on january 28, john oliver is my true hero, when it comes to news reporting, and i hope hbo continues the crusade paving the way for the true journalism, such is vice, a brillent john olivers last week tonight and even the media show newsroom, which i secretly hope becomes a reality in my lifetime, the social transgender frustrations are so comically ridiculous, that most of us choose to just shake our heads and brush it off on a daily basis, seeing john olivers third person perspective on the matter at hand, makes me smile and give me hope for a much better future, without further adieu, here is what this great man had to say, dear marissa, my little angel, ever since i met you, i knew you were a special girl, and true, the past two years together were the most colorful years in the world, i look back to our trips to the ocean and remember how perfect we were together, youve sparked a light in my heart, during these trips, which i didnt know existed, i felt finally safe in your hands and wanted nothing less than to finish our lifetimes together, your good heart and love made me a better person every day, i cannot even imagine, how betrayed you felt, when i told you about my true gender and my decision to transition, there is no excuse for putting you through the unthinkable, especially since you met me as a man, it was the worst lie, and i cannot forgive myself, it will stay with me forever, however i do want you to know, that without you i wouldnt be the woman i am today, you stood by me, after i told you, when everyone was turning theyre backs, when i started transitioning and you even stood by me, when we had my first pedicure trip in public, you taught me how to take my first steps as a woman, do my make, how to dress and all of the other things usually only a mother teaches her child, i want you to know, that my decision to transition was the hardest decision i have ever had to make, especially since i was so in love with you, you have lived a very tough life yourself, and all i wished for, is to bring happiness back to your eyes, with every day passing by, i realized that i cannot give that to you, because inside i was so unhappy with myself, every time i dreamed about our future, it was clouded with thoughts about living a lie, i just couldnt take all the years from your life only to bring an even greater pain, as i understand the value of time so well, i will always consider you as my best friend and i will never forget, who gave me the wings to fly in this world, i am here for you for as long as i am alive, as i was developing the site for all of the other girls out there, i realized i am forgetting the most important people in my life, my dear parents, sister and my beautiful ex, girlfriend all played invaluable parts in my life and i owe them a few words from my heart, dear parents, it has been quite a journey since i left your home 15 years ago, i never expected or planned certain things to happen the way they did, but i know today, thank you and i love you very much, that running away from home at an age of 16 is not what you expected of your child, i can only imagine the sense of ungratefulness, i left in your hearts, as you already know by now, i am a transgender woman, when i first realized that i was in a boys body it took a very big toll on me, and for a child, it became a larger rock, than i could carry on my shoulders, we didnt get along and i certainly did not appreciate the expectations you set for me, however you did not know the battle i was fighting inside, so please forgive me for not being the son you expected me to be, sometimes i wish, i told you what i am going through and i do understand that i couldnt, our home country of lithuania was and is to this day a very dark place, full of people who are very close, minded and for as long as i remember i feared for my life every day i lived there, even as i acted to be a boy, predators and criminals sensed the fragile nature i was at a time and as you remember, i was brutally attacked and beaten countless of times for just being different, it probably gave me the survival strength i have today, never less, the beatings, pain and bruises did not break my spirit, i never changed and continued to be myself, even if i had to act as a boy i was not meant to be, while getting out cast not only by the outside world, but at home too, however i want you to know, that i survived and am living in a country, where freedom is truly the kernel of everything, that i am finally happy and starting to live my life as me, no longer in fear and people around me are supporting me very much, i am very sorry if my transition will affect your public image, however i want you to know that you should be proud of me as your daughter, who have survived even the toughest career environments, such as is u, army special forces, everything i did in the past couple decades, was for you, only in the past few years i understood, that i have to finally live a life for myself, and that life is too short to do otherwise, who are struggling probably harder than i was, i dont know what future i have in front of me, however i surely understand, that a resource such as this project would of helped me to make better decisions during my own life, please forgive me for not being the son, i love you very, very much, your daughter, dear little sister, i know that, we did not get a chance to spend many years together and confide in each other as siblings should, it was a great joy to my heart to be able to be a guest in your wedding this past summer, and i would of not missed it for anything in the world, i know i wasnt there for you as much as i could, and please forgive me, the lost years are now in the past and i greatly hope that you accept me back into your life, no matter how difficult it must be for you, i wish i was able to play with you and be your big sister when you needed me most, i wanted most for you to succeed and have an easier journey after you departed home too and you are, i hope your husband is treating you well and gives you a beautiful child soon, i love you both, i am sorry for the harsh moments of our past communications, i hope you understand why, your big sister, if you are like me, you probably hate filling out paperwork, gender transition includes a certain amount of paperwork and bureaucratic headaches, all of your official documents, such as state id, social security paperwork, and many others include the pesky f or m, you have been trying so hard to not be, i have been doing research for many years now, preparing for the moment, when i will have to do it myself and thankfully the laws seem to become easier and easier to adhere, making the process for all of us easier with every year, having a correct gender on your id also could save you from an uncomfortable situation if, somebody would challenge your use of public bathroom, gym change room and etc, when it comes to the use of the public gender specific areas as, previously mentioned, most states require you to present yourself as the gender of the public area you are entering, click on your state and make your gender on official paperwork match the true you, their website is also a great resource for a few other things, such as legal assistance, transgender rights and you can even share your discrimination stories to make future laws better, i have traveled an incredibly colorful journey in my past 31 years, during these times, male and female in order to really appreciate the gender differences, instead of taking it for granted, while i will never understand why this had to be me going through this, i realize that many are having a much harder time, i really understood that, while visiting africa during my deployment there, all of my biggest issues shrunk to a needle in a haystack, seeing how difficult the everyday life could really be,   so here i am, writing this paragraph, in quite possibly terrible english grammar and spelling, the transition section will be dedicated for my inner thoughts, deepest desires, my body and a challenging path of transition to the public, in the beauty sections, you will find fitness and beauty tips, to stay healthy and pretty, resources section will be the home for the transition intelligence headquarters, clinics and beauty experts, this project, is for the sole purpose of many out there, still hanging on the ledge, i hope i can inspire you to gain strength and stop hiding from your true self, with no regrets of my transparency for this project, it is my only wish to give you a tiny piece of my heart to inspire and strengthen your own, chilling eastern country of lithuania on april 28th, my dear parents were and still are artists at heart, they are very closely connected with the musical realm, teaching the beauty of sound, composing and singing art to the children and teenagers around the country, to this day my parents both live in the same town, where i led such a confusing life for the first decade and a half, on my eight birthday, my only sister was born, she has graduated the institute of art and design in the united kingdom, where she lives with her husband, people most worth mentioning in my life, are my grandparents from my mothers side, who were my only real support during the years spent in lithuania, and i give them credit for everything what i am today, it is my biggest regret, that because of their old age, they will never get to know the real me and then see the product of their good heartiness, growing up in such a musical family, i was expected to become a musician, i feel to this day, that my parents never forgave me for quitting playing the piano, dancing and singing, i actually never forgave myself for quitting playing the piano too, as to this day, instead of music, i picked computers to become as my hobby as a better choice when it came to material gain, i saw my parents struggle with the income and i knew, hearted country of lithuania behind as soon as i become of age, most of you might be thinking, that i am a very unpatriotic person to my original home, but please trust me, life in a country set in such old ways and very close, minded to anything new or different, was not a very welcoming place for a confused little girl to play a boy part in, my life was in danger literally every day as far back as i can remember, at the age of 15 i have graduated the high school and no matter how much i fought with my parents, i wasnt allowed to go to the institute of the cosmetology, i begged and cried and instead was told, that i will be supported by them, only if i choose a technical and a manly profession, such as is computer engineering, after a year of university studies, angry and feeling like a complete stranger in between my peers, i became of age to leave the country without a parent guardian, this led me to drop my school, my first love and my family behind and travel to london in the united kingdom, being such a huge and diverse city, with cold attitude towards the foreigners and immigrants, living experience  was tough for a lone 16 year old girl, i made the best of it and survived on my own, knowing that going back is not an option i want to ever entertain in my mind, what kept me busy was the unlimited access to the internet everywhere, which was allowing for me to grow my mind and my understanding of the world, confused feelings were starting slowly to make a better sense and i finally understood, why would a boy choose to play with barbie dolls instead of trucks and cars, as i matured, working mostly immigrant slavery level jobs in construction field, i grew tired of poverty and sickness from the never ending cold, thankfully soon the 18th birthday arrived, allowing me to apply for the united states of america visa, located in vilnius, extremely happy, i flew out on the first airplane, waving goodbye once more to everything what was supposed to be a safe home for a child, living in the u, has become the end, game of my journey and i knew, that it will be my home, hopefully for the rest of my life, only here, i closed the last few confusing chapters of my inner world, for i started to comprehend scientifically and theoretically about myself, it truly is amazing, how open, minded and free of social constrains the u, in my eyes this country breathed freedom, as time went, it became more and more obvious to me that this is where i will be safe, nine very emotional years and variety of experiences later, i finally have been granted the permanent residence in a form of a green card, fully aware of not actually being a man, the least i could do is pay my dues to the country who will accept me for who i am, infantry basic training, while designed to be very easy, was a bigger challenge than i expected, with true perseverance and stubborn, never give up attitude, i have set my mind to tough it and and give the best service to the country, of true freedom, this moment in my life was also very important, only at this point, i finally understood, that fighting myself and acting as a man is pointless and hurting people around me, myself included, i also was feeling like i was living a lie, from the movie like city of raleigh, located in the north carolina, after just a few memorable moments together i felt a special connection, with that, the gruesome question, is have asked myself a million times before never left my mind, will i choose to be an actor and suppress the true gender behind thick thick walls, deep inside my heart for the sake of love, when the answer came to me, i gathered every piece of strength, i have built over years and for the first time i told her about my true gender struggle, as you could maybe imagine, going from a supposedly toughest green beret to a very emotional woman, was the one of the very wildest things to be heard, especially from her lover, people like her, are the reason i still believe in humanity and a true love, this brings me to today, where i am counting down the last few days in the military, building this site and preparing to finally live the life as true me, it always has been my lifelong dream to be able to help others too, nobody ever should have to wait 31 years to be themselves, i hope you see how rewarding and happy this journey is, from the life i am about to share with you and it is my hope you will flourish from inside, like the beautiful flowers you all are, true beauties, org website, general terms of use 1, org owner maintains this website to provide information to the internet community, such information may be subject to amendment and updating without notice, the information contained in this website is for general information purposes only, the information is provided by thetruebeauty, org owner and whilst we endeavor to keep the information up, date and correct, we make no representations or warranties of any kind, express or implied, about the completeness, suitability or availability with respect to the website or the information, or related graphics contained on the website for any purpose, any reliance you place on such information is therefore strictly at your own risk, in no event will the thetruebeauty, org owner be liable for any loss or damage including without limitation, indirect or consequential loss or damage, org owner, we have no control over the nature, content and availability of those sites, every effort is made to keep the website up and running smoothly, the opinions expressed by the author and owner of thetruebeauty, org website and those providing comments are theirs alone, and do not reflect the opinions of the department of defense, org owner is not responsible for any accuracy of the information provided on the site, access to and use of this information is subject to the following terms and conditions, the sole purpose of this website is to provide information to the reader, it is not intended to form the basis of any investment decision, all of the digital content used in this site is for non, profit purposes only, links to other sources, whilst the information contained within this website is believed to be accurate, no representation or warranty, is or will be given by thetruebeauty, org owner as to the accuracy or completeness of this information or opinions contained herein, any financial projections given are illustrative only, org owner nor should they be taken as implying any indication, assurance or guarantee that those assumptions are correct or exhaustive, any personal information submitted via this website, whether by email or other means, will be used solely by thetruebeauty, org owner and will not be disclosed to any third parties, if you wish to view, amend or delete your personal data please contact us, additional terms of use by the owner3, none of my transition results, positive or negative are subject to be exactly the same for anybody else in this world, we are not responsible for any sustained negative results such as injuries, while performing any of the acts described in the site, in addition, org owner thoughts and opinions change from time to time, owner considers this a necessary consequence of having an open mind, this site is intended to provide a semi, permanent point in time snapshot and manifestation of the various moments and experiences in my life, and as such any thoughts and opinions expressed within out, date posts may not the same, nor even similar, to those thetruebeauty, org owner may hold today

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MusicSongLyrics

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Music + Lyrics

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When your business grows, our security systems grow with you. DEALERS We provide dealer support for all our access control products and subsequent installtions. View pricing and technical specs for Millennium hardware and software. ENGINEERS We're your electronic access control consultants ...

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Find the right program to study English in the USA for international students. Discover the ELS School of English and enjoy the experience of a lifetime.

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A site that will show you step by step how to transform or repurpose unwanted items giving them a new purpose in life.

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tgdoctor.com NS 3599 Target: ns44.domaincontrol.com
tgdoctor.com NS 3599 Target: ns43.domaincontrol.com
tgdoctor.com SOA 3599 MNAME: ns43.domaincontrol.com
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